“Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.”  The Dalai Lama

It’s no secret than I’m stubborn. In many ways, that’s a trait that works in my favor. I do well at setting goals and reaching for them, no matter the odds. I don’t take no for an answer when it’s about something I truly believe in, especially when advocating for others. I will attempt and fail at something over and over again, because I know that process will make me better.

But on the other side, my stubbornness can also be blinding when I cannot get or accomplish what I want. I often am focused so much on achieving a certain outcome that when it falls through, it can be difficult imagining another way.

There is a Japanese term, Wabi Sabi, which, defined simply, means “accept what is true”. In the particular case where my stubbornness gets in the way, it is my reminder to live in the moment. When I am busy worrying about something I did not get, I miss out on the here and now, and the things I can control in my life.

I am stubborn in the belief that anything is possible and the only person ever really standing in the way is one’s self. But, a life planned out in detail is just a fantasy. Sometimes, not getting what you want can be a blessing that you couldn’t have imagined and when it happens, you can be a victim of circumstance or you can always accept what is true, live in the moment, and find opportunity in the imperfect.

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